Well.. i cut them all off..my locs.. and no i don't feel lightheaded or deep remorse, it just feels right. i learnt a while ago that when the decision is right, no matter the scale or gravity of it, the change comes with calm.
I had a baby two months ago.. pregnancy was intense, emotional, long, exhausting, enlightning and then she arrived,,, this daughter that is mine.. Now that was literally life changing.
My core shifted, my convictions, passions, strenghts, everything i knew shifted and she now lays at the centre of that which defines me.
I must admit my locs were my vanity. I'm a simple person, i dont mind going out in sweats, wearing odd socks, having holes in my pants, i go months without makeup but my locs.... they had to be neat always retwisted , washed and looking awesome, every month, like clockwork..
but then i moved from banjul to london,then from london to stockholm. black hair salons.. i only found one! Add my inflamed nerves in my wrists and you can see how retwisting became an issue..
then baby came and i barely have time to brush my teeth let alone this hair.. so it got messy..way too much regrowth.
so i decided to cut it off. if i'm gonna have locs they have to look right, they have to represent the strenght, beauty and power that i believe they are.
so now im curly and working my mini fro on a head identical to my daughters.
Maybe one day we will retwist together...
For now she will grow up with a fro like hers....she will look in the mirror and learn how to detangle her knots and mine.Together we will cornrow and do french twists.
I'm excited that she will learn to love her crown..
Life after Locs may not be the simplest, I may have lost beautiful-waist-lenght-8 year old locs but what i've gained will be enrichingly OURS.